Yuck-O!!!!!

As I have mentioned before.....I watch a lot of the Food Network. Currently on my tivo line-up are: Everyday Italian, Barefoot Contessa, Paula's Home Cooking, Iron Chef America, Road Tasted and Paula's Party....and I'm contemplating adding Nigella Barker's new show, but I can't commit.

The ever-present barrage of cooking shows has been handled with extreme grace and patience from Fiance, who quietly plays online poker while I constantly ask him, "would you eat that?" or "do you think I could make that?"

One of the reasons our happy home is quite harmonious is that we agree on one simple rule: NO RACHAEL RAY AT ANY TIME.

It's actually too bad, and you know why? Her food is quite good. But her accent? QUITE BAD. And calling extra virgin olive oil "EVOO"? Excrutiating. And her constant usage of "Yumm-o?" I want to rip her arms off and beat her with them.

And there are her jeans.....which just always appear to ride slightly too high and are usually paired with some body-hugging t-shirt that does nothing for a short, curvy girl......and I'm a short, curvy girl, so I can freely comment on her fashion sense.

Rachael Ray is getting a lot of mileage these days....with her magazine and her talk show and multiple cook books. I'm cool with that, even though I find her more irritating then nails on a chalkboard, because I think we need more short, curvy women who like to eat as role-models out there. As long as I can turn off the TV and not listen to her.....I'm fine with her success. Mazel Tov, I say.

However....THIS.......I was completely unprepared for. This is WRONG.

This is going to haunt my dreams......and not in a good way.